Durga's Random Thoughts.

Green and brown grass, intermittent, alternating. I fly over them trying to make shapes out of them. Squares mostly. I fly on, to see a building. An old one. But grandeur marks its presence anywhere. A gargoyle on it, with mashed face, looks upto heaven. A bodyless hand on the mashed side. The reason for the disfigurement. I love being mad. It is my opium. I fly up. Look down. See a stair leading to a corridor. Pieces of broken glass. On the corridor's wooden floor and the stairs. I feel like walking on them. I feel it would feel good. A black cow or bull, I donno which. Across my path.Can the river submerge us? This building? I take off again. On a weird bird now. It has a crown but still looks weird and its head looks upward. Suddenly I see the building, a palace presumably, stretches all the way up. And what I saw what just a part of it. I see a horse figure. Its mouth acts like a water source. Showers water. A wicked monkey figurine beneath. Showing faces. I f...

So. I am gonna be somewhere again. Big deal for me. Studies gonna greet me again "Long time no see!". I hope all my neurons aint dead yet. Had a tough time convincing my super possessive dad. Yeah I admit there are cons for being a daddy's gal. But secretly, I love it. ;) The past days tested me. A lot. Jobless, hopeless and what not! I watched 2012 yesterday. Right after we finished, it started thundering and raining. Truth is, it frightened me a bit. :) From a gal with zero tolerance to films and great affinity to scripts, to this! Certainly an achievement. :P Thanks to a friend of mine. My realization : One day, if the world ends, and you know it, you will run to do what is most important for you. Imagine this, is the last day. And you will know what you value the most in your life. Do it. One day, who knows, the world will really end. And then, lets not die in regret.. Now to the thanking part. I got into a good insti. - LIBA, here I come!- :) A number of ...

So, here is yet another Saturday... I am sitting with a hot cup of cappuccino my sis made for me. And looking back, A very busy kinda week. Monday and Tuesday, classes. Wednesday, tour with friends. Thursday tour with family. Friday Saturday, classes again. And when I am not travelling or teaching, I am in front of the TV or comp. Or reading. Plan to go out for a treat tomorrow and the day after. Now to things I noticed this week. Famous people die. And their long lost relatives make money and fame by writing books and giving interviews. They try to disentangle the past experiences with the famous-dead so much that it makes our head spin trying to decide what a happening life they had. We even think the long lost brotherly cousin and sisterly somebody should have been famous, instead of the dead someone. No bonus points for guessing whom I just pulled the legs of. :P Tharoor is an idiot at being discreet. He is into a hell lot of controversies that I hate looking at the newspap...

I just forgave that someone. :) I am peaceful inside now. :) I like talking things out. I did it this time too. Feeling real better.

Peace with self. Actually everything else comes after it. Today, while I was praying [Atheists, please ignore this sentence. I hope one day you get a chance to read it. Agnostics, you are welcome, it is your call. Believers, please continue. :) ] I wondered what was more important than happiness. Peace. And not outside. Inside you. The world could be in chaos and if your inside is brimming with peace, nothing affects you. Your house gives you protection. What if the insides are dirty? Insides themselves are a threat? The insides eat you. And you die from the inside. When you are angry with someone, the anger dirties your mind. Kills you in a way. Takes away the life you are having otherwise. Every negative emotion does that. I forget fast. Especially these negative emotions. Unless I hate that person or thing a lot. Then it lingers. Lingers and sometimes eats me from inside. I have to work hard to forgive or forget then. Not that hating someone changes anything about them. Or forgi...

Two days. Two days into an experiment. Whether I could be a good teacher or not. Nope. I am just getting used to being the adult among kids. I have always been the kid among adults. You know, when kids look upto you in everything you do, it is a bit uncomfortable if you are acting like one. I mean, I cant scold a kid for being late if I myself am late. So, they might slowly change me. For the better. I have students from classes 5th to 9th. The class for 10th standard has not started yet. The youngest are the most active and I find myself in some of them. They notice everything from the fact that I am wearing a jeans to my chudidar top, to the purse I carry, to the way I walk.. It is like you are on scrutiny every moment. Sometimes, they bring out awkward but painful things and I would not have anything to say. Today I was telling them about the need of a job and about taking care of parents when they finally stand on their legs.. And a kid gets up and says "I cant take care...

My scores are directly proportional to my frustration. I owe gamers. And English. :) I play with a robot. This thing knows ALL the right moves that it pisses you every once in a while. I start taking classes from tomo. I hope I turn out a good teacher. Amma was one before she turned to banking. I want to be too. :) Wish me luck! Durga

The world is unfair. I know everybody a bit grown up knows that. Still. My blog has always been about things I learn from life. So cant HELP[!!!] exclaiming when things are so unfair. So I play Scrabble and grumble and shoot people. Not the real shooting, though if given a fair chance, I would. The more angry I am, the more successful in killing I am. I feel like I should be unfair to people too. Just to prove that I can contribute to the whole unfair system of life. Sometimes, I remember someone's words. "God must be either an idiot or a child with all the materials to create world. Nobody else would make chaos when you are omnipotent." He is right. I would not. If I were god. Unless I have the selfish motive of people remembering and pleading to me. But selfishness is supposedly a human trait? I hate things being imposed upon me. It is my life and I want it my way. But no. Just so people tend to act first and think later, I end up paying sh*t for what they ...

There, in a lovely charming land, where the roses made bed, she met him.. And thought it was just a dream. But no, the dream came alive. And she saw him live. They chat, they share,(for so long, that) Being apart became something they couldn't bear. Or so she thought. Until the message he brought. "Please stop loving me babe, You are imagining too much, may be!" She sat broken hearted. The bed of roses, had thorns in them. And thus they parted, you must know, it's the end of a dream.

Sometimes life sucks. Always.