Nov 5, 2016

Names, weird names!

So, these westerners ( yeah, we Indians do not really understand that 'West' actually means a set of 30-40 countries lying somewhere far away and not just a single place, but who cares! ;) ),  they have these very weird names.

The first time I ever came to notice that, was when I read Samuel 'Beckett' 's Waiting for Godot. I mean who names their child Bucket?? :-0
And then I went on to meet Arnold Schwarzenegger. And I am like, here is this guy, who is totally against racism that he names himself (Or his parents do) Shwasss - e - nigger  (Shwas means breath). Breath like a nigger! See he wants to show solidarity and breath like the downtrodden of the past(?). Even if that was not right, who put a child through the agony of naming their child such a long and difficult name to spell? I imagine Arnold in LKG. While all the other kids are learning to write "My name is Job Cutt (note the extra T!) or Sam Wise or Aida Morph and here is this poor kid writing Arnold Shwas-e-negger! And imagine writing that in cursive!!! He would have learned to curse by the end of LKG, I swear!
I donno if I am supposed to feel irked or quirked by this name play of his. Or rather his parents'. They didnt even give the kid a chance at school, did they?
Then I went on to meet (although in absentia) many 'Pit'ts who were Brads, Tom 'Cruise's (cruise where to?), Sean 'Pen'ns, Bruce Will is-es (Is what? no really? Finish that sentence, for heavenssake!), and my favorite, John Wayne. Why would any parent provide their child with a permanent branding that they are vain?? I mean, he might be. But why advertise it??

And once that teenage phase of mine was over, I started noticing the actress' names as well. You know, being totally straight and being under the influence of my own hormones. :P
Then I was aghast. I was missing major fun here. These names were wierd'er', if they could be any more of that.
Anne always had a way. Cameron carried around the setting of her diaz herself and Reese never like using others' cutlery. So she always carried with 'er a spoon. Hally 'Berry' really looked like a delicious sloe berry. So, I did not blame her. She was doing justice to her name.
I then went on to meet midgets (Kid men) and Saradons (Sarandons). Incidentally, Sara(i)don used to be famously advertised drug in India as a head ache relief. 'Sirf ek, Saridon, sardard se araam" The famous nostalgic ad used to ring around in my head every time the woman's name popped up.

Sandra Bullock took it to a whole new level. Not even a spelling mistake like the other parents had the mercy to bestow upon their kids. Bullock. May be their family owned a bullock cart, 100s of years ago or something. But give the kid a break!

Not that indian names are awesome or anything. We have, like Russel Peters pointed out to me the other day, Sukdeeps and Hardiks. (Read 'em out loud, if you didnt get it!)
Oh to hell with Russel, I had the luck to personally meet Ms Sheddy and Ms Shimmy. And I am still wondering about the agonies of nick names and double entendres they must have had to go through during their teenage years.

Till next time!

Note : People who don't get sarcasm or cant understand a joke are unwelcome to this post.

Nov 1, 2016

Chali Machine

This website lets you create "Chalis" (poor jokes) in Malayalam :, an initiative by a bunch of enthusiastic artists.

Here are a few I made (Click on the images for a larger version):-

Malayali's English


And Imagining what goes through my husband's mind when I ask him to taste stuff I make...

Kettathum Kekkathathum!

Hope you enjoyed!
You can also upload your own images and work on them as well. The possibilities are virtually endless.
Go ahead, make some chalis!